(Photo by Maggie Mengel/AKSM Photography).
“You. Speak. Out.”
Dear Villanova,
Before transferring out of Vanillanova, I had a couple of instances that made me question my place at the school. One experience I had was being fetishized by a conservative classmate of mine who "supposedly" liked me, but admitted to liking the idea of having a POC partner in the future when he runs for political office. That experience was definitely twisted, but I'd like touch on another hurtful experience...
During my freshman year, I lived in Good Counsel with two white roommates who became panhel sisters of KKG and AXO. At first, I didn't think much of my rooming situation - I was almost always outside my room at CEER doing projects or with my friends on campus, the majority of whom are POC. Almost mid-way into my first semester, I overheard my roommates talk about a situation on the first floor where their two white friends were having "disagreements" with their Black roommate and were pushing her to move out through multiple racist acts. When the roommate left, my roommates both visited the room with now 2 residents, and the KKG roommate was fixated on getting the same.
In the weeks that followed, I overheard the KKG roommate talk about the idea of having the room to only her and the AXO roommate. I knew what the deal was - she was going to TRY to convince me to move out. Nonetheless, I was right. From the start of November to the end of the fall semester, she would directly and in subtle ways try to convince me to move out. I would overhear her talk to her white friends, while in the room with me, about me moving out and how much space the two would finally have. Outright by my ear. She once woke me up from a nap to explain me her idea. She let me know that she had already talked to Housing and they were "on board" with me moving out to Stanford. "You'd be with a rando but I'd pay for your fridge, any additional furniture, whatever you want - but please please please could you move out?" That was the first time she confronted me about it and the ONLY time I even allowed her to speak to me about it.
The weeks to come, we had falling outs and had the RA come to our dorm to "work things out." Days, weeks - it was one of the most uncomfortable times of my life. One of the worst moments of my life occured in that time frame. Her grandmother and sibling were in the room and, right before coming into the room after a shower, I overheard her yelling about how she hated this and that thing about me, and how "this spi-." I walked in before she could finish calling me the word.
The semester was coming to a close and she continuously notably hated me. She'd act belligerent, belittle me while in the room. I made my stand though, and told her I would not leave the room. She was forced to move out. The second semester of my freshman year comprised of her returning to the room multiple times to sleep there and accompany the AXO roommate. I would find my drawers opened in the middle of the night, Villanova apparel taken, and identification cards out of my wallet. But at least I stood for myself, right?...
The two experiences are only two of multiple hurtful experiences I had while at Vanillanova. I wasn't the only one. EVERY SINGLE POC I KNEW ON THAT CAMPUS WENT THROUGH THE SAME THING. The Villanova bubble was something so true. Entitlement was and continues to run rampant at the university. RACISM continues to run through the university's veins. When I left Villanova my third semester, so did three other Black classmates of mine after similar experiences. Some of the last interactions I had at Villanova - by white faculty, non-Black POC faculty and Black faculty - was that Villanova was too tough for me, that I should consider this local college or that local colllege. I now attend the nation's most diverse college campus and feel a hundred times better. My point: do not back down. Nobody, and I repeat - NOBODY - can tell you who you should be, where you should be, and what you should be.
You. Speak. Out.
Sincerely,
Anonymous Former Student